This is Really Stupid

Abandoned Pizzeria
Las Vegas

In the cold corpse-air of the abandoned building, they came together.

Well, three of them did.

"FREDDY MY FUCKING HEAD IS GONE."

One of them turned, servos whining with age, and glared at the open door to the parts and services room. There wasn't enough mechanisms in the face to express how it felt. It tried, anyway. The mouth opened, and a hissing tape recorder played;

"just use a spare you insufferable garbage can"

"BUT IT'S NOT THE SAME." 

"hurry up this is important shit"

Eventually, the missing figure stumbled from the back room and joined the other four, looking as sheepish as it was possible for a costumed robot to be. The leader didn't spare it a glance, but simply cast its glowing eyes across the assembled figures.

"gather around all you shitlords and shitheads," intoned the leader, "for i have intercepted

the mail"

Expectant silence.

"it turns out we're all fucking fired"

"ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING?" This roar came from the most broken of the four, his teeth gnashing and mouth spitting sparks. His hook dragged across the floor's tiles with a screech.

"sadly no, it appears you have insulted your last birthday child"

"WHAT THE FUCK ARE WE GONNA DO I HAVE KIDS TO FEED"

"none of us have any kids you yiffy pile of useless garbage"

The leader sighed and shook its head.

"it seems we no longer have any choice my shittiest companions"

The word were spoken with grave solemninty, and the others knew their time had come.

"we're going to have to rob a casino to pay for our nights of debauchery"

"YES"

"FUCK YES LETS FUCKING DO IT"

The third one, who hadn't made a noise this whole time, weighed in. "devour my hot bird ass freddy"

"no"